The Great Divide

Like all Americans, whether or not we are satisfied with the election results, I’m freaking drained. The divisive atmosphere over the last four years was energetically way too much to hold. The collective has been so angry and frustrated; that bubble had to burst. Relief was desperately needed. This is not a post about my political opinion, or who I voted for. I’m keeping quiet on that. Personally, I didn’t feel comfortable choosing either candidate. I had anticipated a heavy heart no matter who won, only one side felt heavier for me. Rather, this is a post about my takeaway from the election process, which is essentially disbelief in how people treated each other throughout. The hypocrisy being emitted from people claiming to care only about “unity” is astounding to me. It’s like, are you seriously not hearing yourself? SCREAMING about unity and inclusion, while threatening to cut your friend/colleague/significant other/child/pet out of your life if they dare to have a different opinion. That’s the thing about elections. They are scary times, even under normal circumstances. This election process was heightened for obvious reasons. It was very hard to maintain any semblance of balance and calm, in regards to the topic of politics. But it’s like a whole country needed to be reminded that this is a democratic bipartisanship, in which people are allowed to disagree. The system is built on this premise. Who didn’t get the memo on that?? Because I’m in the New York area, which is predominantly a blue state, I heard nonstop about Biden supporters vehemently attacking anyone who dared to vote for Trump, or even just question or criticize Biden/Harris. Granted, I’m sure in the Deep South it’s the reverse, with red voters going after blue voters. This isn’t ok no matter who it’s coming from, but I found that it left a much more bitter taste in my mouth coming from those who claimed to want to “end divisiveness”. The hypocrisy was maddening to me. I always write that if you are so rock solid in your beliefs, then you aren’t threatened or triggered by a different viewpoint. I believe this to be true, so it was head scratching to me that folks claiming to wholeheartedly in favor of whichever candidate they fully backed, instantly went on the offensive to attack anyone with a different viewpoint. Honestly, I took my daughter out of the city for a few days prior to the results. A lot of her friends were going home. These young men and women did not feel safe. I resented that New York City didn’t feel safe, unless one party won. Correct me if I’m wrong, but when did liberalism become synonymous with anarchy? Even today, I had to exit two unpleasant conversations with people wanting to know my thoughts on the election. I did not tell either of these people who I voted for. I answered with my problems about Trump, which were expectedly met with nods of approval. As soon as I began to state my concerns about Biden/Harris, I was picked apart. It was ridiculous. These are friends of mine with whom I should be able to have a rational conversation. Did you ask me “how I’m doing” because you care, or were you looking to be antagonistic? The best thing I could do for all involved, especially myself, was to bounce. One guy was saying how he hated Trump because he himself is a Socialist. Well, I hate to break it to you, but this is a capitalist country. If you only want a Socialist government, then perhaps you’re really living in the wrong place. That stubborn need to be right is very suspicious to me, especially when its coming from someone who got their desired results. I know this whole point in time is a lot to process, but you won... so stop fighting about it! And if you lost, then just accept it, my goodness. It’s enough on both sides. How can a nation claim to want to begin a national healing process, if everyone is still ripping each other’s heads off? Do you want to bridge gaps as you claim, or continue to flip out on anyone not reading off your script? That sure doesn’t sound like gap bridging to me. And btw, if someone told you that you’re friendship is over if you voted differently than them, then trust me, they’d have ended the relationship anyway, at some point. Threatening to end a friendship based on that, is the very definition of a conditional relationship. It sends the message that “my need to be right is more important than your place in my life”. It’s so obnoxious, and maybe it’s time for you to leave anyway. Sound like Trump? Listen, Dude, you lost. Just leave. It’s over. Biden won fairly.
I think that in order for real healing to begin, every single one of us needs to move the fuck on. Let’s make each other more important than the ego’s need to get its way. How we proceed is always a choice. Anyone claiming to want freedom, hope, and unity won’t find it while walking down Anger Street. We wind up where we do, based on the paths we consciously choose. If the past four years were miserable in so many ways, with this particular year being off the charts insane, then we are being called on to choose differently. It’s a new administration. Let’s use that as symbolism, no matter who we voted for. Despite one possibly having unfavorable thoughts on the new president, let’s choose peace; peace within, peace without, peace of mind, and peace of heart. We deserve it and we need it. It’s the only way this shit is going to correct itself. All our attitudes matter, just like every vote matters. Separation hurts all of us.