French Toast? OUI ‼️

You may not like the French, but I'm assuming you like French toast. If not, you're crazy.

Many a New Jersey teenage night was spent in a chrome diner booth, eating this with my friends after a movie. In West Orange NJ, this was literally the highlight of my otherwise bleak week. I can't believe it took Dr. Atkins to point out that THIS IS A MAJOR CARB. My mother used to say with conviction, "It's not the bagel, it's what you put on the bagel." So I'd eat ten plain bagels, thinking I was doing myself a favor, especially if it was "whole wheat". Same philosophy with pasta; marinara sauce, no problem🍝‼️. It was a vegetable, since it's tomato based. I felt vastly superior to anyone eating fettuccini Alfredo or a bagel and cream cheese. Atkins must have seen a nation of thick people such as myself, and thought Jackpot‼. This was gonna be easy. Truthfully, I'm deeply grateful to him because his food philosophy of essentially no carbs, does seem to work for me overall. Believe me, I indulge but with awareness. The carbs I do choose are carefully selected and portioned. I'm not blessed with a naturally speedy metabolism, and have never been one of those annoying bitches who can eat what they wanted. The little carb thing jives with my bod. When I was recently in Italy, I basically wore a t shirt that said "Dr Atkins can F himself", since I was on a diet of pizza and pasta🍝🍕.

Actually, that Is a t-shirt I'd totally buy in real life. I'd laugh if I saw it on someone else. I know in most other parts of the world, the Atkins philosophy is looked down upon, but in the Tri State area it's alive and well. Maybe our carbs are loaded with more chemicals and therefore not easily digestible. Whatever the reason, this is where I live and I have to adjust to what's being sold on American supermarket shelves. It's no surprise that due to my French toast/bagel/pasta affinity in days of yore, that I was more than double the size I am now. I was never heavy, but the word "zaftig" would occasionally come up. That sounded like an insult; "voluptuous" felt like more of a euphemism. End result: yes, French toast is a delicious, fattening carbohydrate. It is a decadent treat that I will indulge in occasionally. This is hard when I make it every single week for my kids. I will sometimes sit next to them and stare creepily at them while they pick at it, willing them to wolf it down so I can partake vicariously. I have been known to lick the syrup off the plate at the end, so I can at least taste that part.

Believe it or not, motherhood isn't as glamorous as it seems. I do love making French toast, since I really enjoy using my griddle. I also feel like since it's made with eggs and milk, I can pat myself on the butt for giving them some calcium and protein😜. I started this weekly ritual when my kids went to a Jewish summer camp, that gave each child a large challah every Friday for Shabbat. The challahs would pile up, leaving me feeling like Lucy and Ethel in the bread episode. French toast was the solution to drowning in challah. Allow me to share:

 Ingredients:

• A large chocolate chip, cinnamon , or vanilla crumb challah, cut into inch and a quarter slices.
• Equal mixture of well beaten eggs and milk. I never measure, but try 6 eggs and a cup of milk, adding more if needed. The mixture should be a pale yellow.
• A couple dashes of vanilla is the secret.

Directions:

Submerge each slice into the mixture until both sides are covered. Don't over saturate. Fry each side in melted butter until golden brown on each side. Cool on a wire rack to prevent sogginess. Top with syrup, whipped cream, powdered sugar, or fresh berries. I'm not really reinventing the wheel here, but when something is this good, we can respect the essence of the dish. 

PS; forget skim milk. No point. Go for the gold with the highest percentage you have on hand. Otherwise it's like ordering a Big Mac and a Diet Coke.